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Welcome to Spidey's cardio workout.

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What the...

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Uh, excuse me.

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Good morning. This is your 9 a.m. wake-up call.

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Curtain of 1-555-HALP A NICE DAY.

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Already?

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Guess we'll have to finish our workout some other time.

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Okay, class, pair up with your partners

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and go do your experiments.

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50% of your term rests on this experiment.

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In other words, do not screw up.

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Well, what'd I miss?

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Just like the entire assignment.

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Experiment of your choice illustrating the relationship

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between thought and behavior.

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We're supposed to partner up.

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Oh. Then, uh, want to be partners?

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Oh, sorry. I'm taking.

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Coolest partner in the class, if I must say.

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Good morning, Mr. Dylan.

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It's pretty cool, huh?

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You know what that is? Your new lab partner.

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You're about to enter the Christina Zone.

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Ooh!

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I'm really easy to get along with.

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The truth is, I have an almost preternatural ability

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to communicate with others.

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Preternatural?

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Mm-hmm. Practically supernatural.

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You know, psychokinesis, ESP, Jedi mind stuff.

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You believe in all that, don't you?

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Actually, no.

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Okay, how about cryptozoology?

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You have to believe in that, 'cause hello, human spider.

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Out there saving people, pretty awesome.

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Yeah, Spiderman's cool.

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Cool, mysterious, big-hearted.

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And those spider eyes.

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Ugh. I get butterflies just looking.

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Mm. Yup. Me and the Spidey-Dude are soulmates.

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Soulmates? Um...

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So, shouldn't we talk about our experiment?

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Like I told you, this is where my new invention is.

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I know, solitary trade inventing.

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You wouldn't associate it with someone so verbal like me.

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It's a gift, really.

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Listen, I'm not sure that's gonna--

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Not this!

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Bottom is creating a super glue gun.

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Acid polymers.

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Pretty much melted half my high school science class.

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It's a da!

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Here it is. My ESP crown.

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I don't--

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And now, I am going to read your mind.

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Okay.

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First, let's set the mood.

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Peter Parker, yes.

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Let's see, let's see, let's see. Uh-huh.

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You like to study. You live off-campus.

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Right, well, you have serious major mega-girl problems.

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With a redhead.

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Yes?

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See, I told you, let's crank it up!

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Christina!

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Christina, where are you?

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Where are you?

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Whoa, you all right?

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I need to be alone now.

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What? Are you? I mean--

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Sorry, Peter. We'll have to experiment some other time.

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Where are you?

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Christina, where are you?

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I'm here. Where are you?

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Who are you? On your desk.

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Getting warmer.

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I've been calling and calling.

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If you don't listen, how are we ever going to be together?

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Now, are you ready to do everything I say?

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So, how was psych?

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MJ, it was a nightmare.

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I got the lab partner from Sunnydale.

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Want to grab lunch? I got a serious pastrami jones working.

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Okay, I know that look.

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Extra lean, on sourdough, hold the mustard.

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And here I thought you weren't paying attention.

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No, I pay plenty of attention.

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You do? You know what our problem is?

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We don't ever share our thoughts, our feelings.

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That's your hunger talking.

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Peter, I don't think you get it.

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We've been friends for, like, ever, right?

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And we know a lot of details about each other.

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But see, if we're going to make this shift, you know,

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it has to be more than knowing my favorite sandwich.

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It should be like... like...

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Like ESP?

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Like communicating.

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Oh, okay. I can do that.

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Can you? You're always running off somewhere.

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But I realized I have no idea what you do or where you go.

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I mean, who are you, really?

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Right now? A guy who wants to take you to lunch.

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This is what we're going to do.

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Every day, starting tomorrow, we write a note to each other,

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divulging a personal tidbit.

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A tidbit?

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Uh-huh. Something small, but deep.

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A secret.

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I'm determined, Peter.

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I will get to know the real you.

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I'll do anything for us to be together, Spider-Man. Anything.

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Well, you're going to have to find me, aren't you?

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The real me.

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But how? I mean, it's not like you're in the phone book.

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Think, Christina. Think.

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How do you lure the amazing Spider-Man to you?

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What do heroes do?

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They... they save people?

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She shoots, she scores.

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Go catch yourself a spider.

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So, there you go. I need a tidbit.

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A tidbit?

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I know. That was my reaction.

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So, then she explained. She wants something deeply personal and soul-bearing.

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Help me, Harry Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope.

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Well, I got only one piece of advice.

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Get out. Get out while you still can.

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Come on. I'm serious.

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It's a tough one, buddy. We're guys.

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We don't do soul-surging.

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I have to think of something to write.

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Okay, dude. You like MJ. You want her to be your girlfriend?

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Well, there's only one thing she wants you to write on that piece of paper.

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How do you really feel about her?

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I feel... good about her. Really good.

145
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Yeah. That's pure poetry. Suck it up, man.

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Put pen to paper and take the plunge.

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Okay, Spider-Man. Time to play hero.

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Good thing I was in the neighborhood.

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I knew it. I knew you'd come. Oh, Spidey. This just froze it.

150
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What? What does this prove?

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I knew. If I jumped, you'd save me.

152
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And once you were here, you'd realize that we're...

153
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We're what? What do you think? We're like soulmates?

154
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Oh, my God. You knew exactly what I was thinking.

155
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This just proves it. We are soulmates. We are!

156
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No, we are not. I don't even know you.

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Now don't put yourself or others in danger. Ever again.

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I was trying to be a good girlfriend.

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I was only doing what you said. I thought it would make you happy.

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Well, next time, be more careful.

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I don't have time to go around saving careless girls.

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Oh, Spidey. I'm so sorry. I blew it.

163
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Please, tell me. How else can I find you?

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Figure it out.

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MJ, a personal tidbit about me that nobody knows is...

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When I was little, I used to get a rash every time I took a bath.

168
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Must go deeper.

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MJ, what you don't know is...

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I'm not nearly as smart as everyone thinks.

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I had to take my driver's license test twice.

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MJ, deep down inside me...

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I'm afraid there's a big, boring nothing.

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I don't know what else I can tell you.

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Except for the coolest, secret stuff about me which I can never share with you.

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Like this.

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And thanks to Empire State U's own Peter Parker for that exclusive Spider-Man footage.

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Peter Parker. He always seems to know where to find Spider-Man.

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Okay, I'll have an ice vanilla latte with non-dairy whipped cream.

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That moo-wang. 20,000 students at Empire U and he remembers that I'm lactose intolerant.

181
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Peter Parker? Where?

182
00:10:19,540 --> 00:10:21,540
Wait, when did you see Peter last?

183
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Parker, Parker. I don't know.

184
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But his roomie, Harry Osborne, just bought two half-calf granny macchiatos and went that way.

185
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Peter, I'm so glad you're here. This is so exciting. Here.

186
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Here's mine. Where's yours?

187
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Well, I...

188
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Now, come on. I won't accept any excuse. Cough it up.

189
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It might not be what you're hoping.

190
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Relax. It'll be great. Mine first, okay?

191
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When I was little and my parents were fighting, I would hide in my closet and pretend I was a stowaway on a ship.

192
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It was grimy and cold there, but I was happy because I wasn't stuck in the house. Nobody fought.

193
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Wow.

194
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Say no more. I'll read yours.

195
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No, don't. Don't.

196
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I couldn't believe what he wrote. Go ahead, read it.

197
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To MG, I confess that no one else in the world knows I'm allergic to grouper, the fish.

198
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I was deeply, nakedly honest with him, and he offered up grouper.

199
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Well, what'd you say?

200
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Thank you, Peter Parker, for wading toe deep into our relationship.

201
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You obviously have no conception of what really matters in life, and so will die a sad, pathetic, lonely old man.

202
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Ouch. You said that?

203
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Maybe not with words.

204
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But my body language made it pretty clear.

205
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So now what?

206
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I don't know. It's all so very messed up.

207
00:12:05,540 --> 00:12:08,540
Well, long as you don't flip-flop back to Spider-Man.

208
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Spider-Man? Don't worry. I know how much you hate him.

209
00:12:11,540 --> 00:12:13,540
Besides, I am so over that.

210
00:12:13,540 --> 00:12:18,540
Yeah. Well, I bet he's not over you. In fact, I bet that sleaze bucket still has the hots for you.

211
00:12:18,540 --> 00:12:20,540
Harry, stop it.

212
00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:24,540
See? No, I have to help Peter. It'll be you and Spider-Man all over again.

213
00:12:26,540 --> 00:12:29,540
MJ, you're in love with Mary Jane Watson?

214
00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:31,540
Mmm. Possibly.

215
00:12:31,540 --> 00:12:33,540
But you can't be. You can't be.

216
00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:34,540
The heart feels what it feels.

217
00:12:34,540 --> 00:12:38,540
The heart can change with enough determination. I know it can.

218
00:12:38,540 --> 00:12:41,540
So, you do whatever it takes?

219
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Anything.

220
00:12:42,540 --> 00:12:47,540
Well, if that's the case, all you really need to do to win Spider-Man's heart...

221
00:12:47,540 --> 00:12:48,540
Yeah?

222
00:12:48,540 --> 00:12:52,540
...is remove the obstacle between you.

223
00:12:52,540 --> 00:12:54,540
Remove? You mean MJ, as in...

224
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:57,540
That's right. Eliminate.

225
00:13:05,540 --> 00:13:06,540
Okay, okay. Here's the money shot.

226
00:13:06,540 --> 00:13:11,540
Look, Spider-Man focuses, and boom! Catches the car with webbing from only one hand.

227
00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:13,540
Come on. That didn't look so hard.

228
00:13:13,540 --> 00:13:17,540
If I could shoot Sticky-Goop from my wrist, I wouldn't have to focus on it.

229
00:13:17,540 --> 00:13:19,540
He's a guy. I bet he's thinking about girls.

230
00:13:19,540 --> 00:13:20,540
He is not.

231
00:13:20,540 --> 00:13:24,540
I mean, he seems a little too busy for that.

232
00:13:24,540 --> 00:13:25,540
Eh, maybe you're right.

233
00:13:25,540 --> 00:13:30,540
Ooh, come to think of it. What's up with that mask? He probably looks like Goat Boy under that thing.

234
00:13:30,540 --> 00:13:31,540
Yeah.

235
00:13:31,540 --> 00:13:32,540
Anyone else seen this?

236
00:13:32,540 --> 00:13:34,540
Um, no. You're the first.

237
00:13:34,540 --> 00:13:39,540
Exactly. You keep supplying me with footage, people will take notice, and then you'll become famous.

238
00:13:39,540 --> 00:13:40,540
You think?

239
00:13:40,540 --> 00:13:45,540
I know. And I will make reporter and get my own morning talk show.

240
00:13:45,540 --> 00:13:50,540
Actually, I never really considered being famous. I just like taking pictures.

241
00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:53,540
Humility. My charming quality.

242
00:13:53,540 --> 00:13:54,540
Aww, nice.

243
00:13:54,540 --> 00:13:55,540
Who is it?

244
00:14:08,540 --> 00:14:09,540
What do you want?

245
00:14:09,540 --> 00:14:14,540
Spider-Man, here, to profess his true and undying affection for me.

246
00:14:14,540 --> 00:14:16,540
Candy and I will be together forever.

247
00:14:16,540 --> 00:14:17,540
You're insane.

248
00:14:17,540 --> 00:14:18,540
Insanely jealous.

249
00:14:18,540 --> 00:14:22,540
Look, there's nothing going on between me and Spider-Man. You lie!

250
00:14:24,540 --> 00:14:26,540
I don't like liars.

251
00:14:29,540 --> 00:14:30,540
Oh, no.

252
00:14:38,540 --> 00:14:39,540
We're early for our wedding.

253
00:14:39,540 --> 00:14:47,540
Don't the lovebirds be surprised to see an uninvited guest splayed on the buffet with acid holes where her vital arcades should be?

254
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,540
What can you possibly hope to accomplish?

255
00:14:49,540 --> 00:14:54,540
I will prove that Spider-Man loves me, even if it's buried deep in his subconscious.

256
00:14:54,540 --> 00:14:59,540
You see, everyone, even Spider-Man, needs help to eat through facades and expose true feelings.

257
00:14:59,540 --> 00:15:02,540
But what if, what if it's not you?

258
00:15:02,540 --> 00:15:04,540
Then you'd better hope it's not you.

259
00:15:06,540 --> 00:15:10,540
I'm melting! I'm melting!

260
00:15:10,540 --> 00:15:12,540
Hey, know what I'm feeling right now?

261
00:15:12,540 --> 00:15:13,540
Yeah.

262
00:15:13,540 --> 00:15:15,540
Your invention sucks.

263
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:20,540
Christina, I think this crown did something to your mind to make you act like this.

264
00:15:20,540 --> 00:15:27,540
No. I've always known you were my soulmate, Spider-Man. I just needed you to realize it, too.

265
00:15:30,540 --> 00:15:31,540
Put the wires on.

266
00:15:31,540 --> 00:15:32,540
It doesn't work.

267
00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:35,540
Put the wires on! Do it now!

268
00:15:35,540 --> 00:15:40,540
Okay, then. Read my mind. Tell me what I really feel.

269
00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:43,540
Wait! How do you know you're not just projecting your own feelings onto him?

270
00:15:43,540 --> 00:15:48,540
How many times has this crown thing been absolutely correct? She has a point.

271
00:15:48,540 --> 00:15:51,540
So I'll have to ask a question I know I can prove right or wrong.

272
00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,540
Who are you under that mask?

273
00:16:03,540 --> 00:16:06,540
Oh, my God. I know who Spider-Man is.

274
00:16:07,540 --> 00:16:11,540
I had no idea you were so average and unexciting.

275
00:16:12,540 --> 00:16:14,540
I mean, no offense.

276
00:16:34,540 --> 00:16:36,540
I'm not a fan of Spider-Man.

277
00:16:36,540 --> 00:16:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

278
00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

279
00:16:40,540 --> 00:16:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

280
00:16:42,540 --> 00:16:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

281
00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

282
00:16:46,540 --> 00:16:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

283
00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

284
00:16:50,540 --> 00:16:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

285
00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

286
00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

287
00:16:56,540 --> 00:16:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

288
00:16:58,540 --> 00:17:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

289
00:17:00,540 --> 00:17:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

290
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

291
00:17:04,540 --> 00:17:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

292
00:17:06,540 --> 00:17:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

293
00:17:08,540 --> 00:17:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

294
00:17:10,540 --> 00:17:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

295
00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

296
00:17:14,540 --> 00:17:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

297
00:17:16,540 --> 00:17:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

298
00:17:18,540 --> 00:17:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

299
00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

300
00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

301
00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

302
00:17:26,540 --> 00:17:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

303
00:17:28,540 --> 00:17:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

304
00:17:30,540 --> 00:17:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

305
00:17:32,540 --> 00:17:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

306
00:17:34,540 --> 00:17:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

307
00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

308
00:17:38,540 --> 00:17:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

309
00:17:40,540 --> 00:17:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

310
00:17:42,540 --> 00:17:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

311
00:17:44,540 --> 00:17:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

312
00:17:46,540 --> 00:17:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

313
00:17:48,540 --> 00:17:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

314
00:17:50,540 --> 00:17:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

315
00:17:52,540 --> 00:17:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

316
00:17:54,540 --> 00:17:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

317
00:17:56,540 --> 00:18:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

318
00:18:00,540 --> 00:18:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

319
00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

320
00:18:04,540 --> 00:18:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

321
00:18:06,540 --> 00:18:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

322
00:18:08,540 --> 00:18:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

323
00:18:10,540 --> 00:18:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

324
00:18:12,540 --> 00:18:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

325
00:18:14,540 --> 00:18:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

326
00:18:16,540 --> 00:18:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

327
00:18:18,540 --> 00:18:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

328
00:18:20,540 --> 00:18:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

329
00:18:22,540 --> 00:18:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

330
00:18:24,540 --> 00:18:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

331
00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

332
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

333
00:18:30,540 --> 00:18:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

334
00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

335
00:18:34,540 --> 00:18:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

336
00:18:36,540 --> 00:18:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

337
00:18:38,540 --> 00:18:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

338
00:18:40,540 --> 00:18:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

339
00:18:42,540 --> 00:18:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

340
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

341
00:18:46,540 --> 00:18:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

342
00:18:48,540 --> 00:18:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

343
00:18:50,540 --> 00:18:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

344
00:18:54,540 --> 00:18:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

345
00:18:56,540 --> 00:18:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

346
00:18:58,540 --> 00:19:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

347
00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

348
00:19:02,540 --> 00:19:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

349
00:19:04,540 --> 00:19:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

350
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

351
00:19:08,540 --> 00:19:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

352
00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

353
00:19:12,540 --> 00:19:14,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

354
00:19:14,540 --> 00:19:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

355
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

356
00:19:18,540 --> 00:19:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

357
00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

358
00:19:22,540 --> 00:19:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

359
00:19:24,540 --> 00:19:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

360
00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

361
00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

362
00:19:30,540 --> 00:19:32,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

363
00:19:32,540 --> 00:19:34,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

364
00:19:34,540 --> 00:19:36,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

365
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:38,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

366
00:19:38,540 --> 00:19:40,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

367
00:19:40,540 --> 00:19:42,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

368
00:19:42,540 --> 00:19:44,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

369
00:19:44,540 --> 00:19:46,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

370
00:19:46,540 --> 00:19:48,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

371
00:19:48,540 --> 00:19:50,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

372
00:19:50,540 --> 00:19:52,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

373
00:19:52,540 --> 00:19:54,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

374
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

375
00:19:56,540 --> 00:19:58,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

376
00:19:58,540 --> 00:20:00,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

377
00:20:00,540 --> 00:20:02,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

378
00:20:02,540 --> 00:20:04,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

379
00:20:04,540 --> 00:20:06,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

380
00:20:06,540 --> 00:20:08,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

381
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

382
00:20:10,540 --> 00:20:12,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

383
00:20:12,540 --> 00:20:16,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

384
00:20:16,540 --> 00:20:18,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

385
00:20:18,540 --> 00:20:20,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

386
00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:22,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

387
00:20:22,540 --> 00:20:24,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

388
00:20:24,540 --> 00:20:26,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

389
00:20:26,540 --> 00:20:28,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.

390
00:20:28,540 --> 00:20:30,540
I'm a fan of Spider-Man.